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Scouts Camping Trip



Dear Mum,

Our Scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the
flood on TV and got worried. We are okay. Only one of our tents and 2
sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because
we were all up on the mountain looking for Adam when it happened.

Oh yes, please call Adam's mother and tell her he is okay. He can't
write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and
rescue Jeeps. It was great. We never would have found Adam in the dark
if it hadn't been for the lightning.

Scoutmaster Ted got mad at Adam for going on a hike alone without
telling anyone. Adam said he did tell him, but it was during the fire
so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that if you put gas on a
fire, the gas will blow up?

The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did and also some of our clothes.

Matthew is going to look weird until his hair grows back.

We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Ted gets the bus fixed. It
wasn't his fault about the crash. The brakes worked okay when we left.
Scoutmaster Ted said that with a bus that old, you have to expect
something to break down; that's probably why he can't get insurance.

We think it's a super bus. He doesn't care if we get it dirty, and if
it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the bumpers. It gets pretty hot
with 45 people in a bus made for 24. He let us take turns riding in
the trailer until the policeman stopped and talked to us.

Scoutmaster Ted is a neat guy. Don't worry, he is a good driver. In
fact, he is teaching Horace how to drive on the mountain roads where
there aren't any cops. All we ever see up there are huge logging
trucks.

This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and swimming
out to the rapids. Scoutmaster Ted wouldn't let me because I can't
swim, and Adam was afraid he would sink because of his cast (it's
concrete because we didn't have any plaster), so he let us take the
canoe out. It was great. You can still see some of the trees under the
water from the flood.

Scoutmaster Ted isn't crabby like some scoutmasters. He didn't even
get mad about the life jackets. He has to spend a lot of time working
on the bus so we are trying not to cause him any trouble.

Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges. When Andrew
dived into the lake and cut his arm, we all got to see how a
tourniquet works.

Steve and I threw up, but Scoutmaster Ted said it was probably just
food poisoning from the left-over chicken. He said they got sick that
way with food they ate in prison. I'm so glad he got out and became
our scoutmaster. He said he sure figured out how to get things done
better while he was doing his time. By the way, what is a pedal-file?

I have to go now. We are going to town to post our letters and buy
some more beer and ammo. Don't worry about anything. We are fine and
tonight it's my turn to sleep in the Scoutmaster's tent.
Nov. 14, 2009  (Edited Nov. 16, 2009)
 
Picture of david hough
david hough
Brilliant. But don't just leave it there. There's money in writing as good as this.
Nov. 14, 2009 
 
Picture of Steve Coffin
Steve Coffin
Hi Bill
Allan Sherman is alive and well, albeit a little more risque!!
 
Well done Bill, a very funny read.
 
Cheers
 
Steve
Nov. 14, 2009 
 
Picture of John Stickland
John Stickland
Hi all.
Now my reputation as a miserable old git is ruined completely.
First I read the weather related postings and began to chuckle.
Then I read Bill's contribution on scout camping and the chuckle developed into a belly laugh.
What with Chris's contribution in Olde Englische and Bills contribution, my whole word is falling apart.
Then there's Mike, on about U Boats, they really must have had bad weather for the floods to be that bad that they have submarines on their rugger field.
Don't understand it all, guess it's me age!
Oh by the way the weather has been equally SH one T here as well.
Spent the day laying concrete, inside a building I hasten to add, putting a new floor in the tractor shed with Alex and Aaron.
Her indoors has been out shopping, the wind is so bad she had trouble docking her broomstick when she got home.
Ah well.
Bi for now.
Sticky.
Nov. 14, 2009  (Edited Nov. 14, 2009)
 
Picture of CHRIS WILTSHIRE
CHRIS WILTSHIRE
From the nature of the use and abuse of our fine English language in this letter I surmise the  wretched boy is either American or just possibly Canadian.
 
This is something of a relief as I cannot believe that any responsible English scouting group leader could EVER behave as irresponsibly. Surely he would have insisted on reading any missives sent by boys under his "control" and censoring anything that might incriminate him.
 
This is the difference between US and THEM, or at least it used to be. WE used to ensure we didn't wash our dirty linen in public and get caught. Johnny Yankee with all his openness and freedom of speech is ALWAYS getting caught out!
 
Another matter that might concern Mr Williams is that as this child has made a clear accusation of potential CHILD ABUSE and  Mr Williams has a legal duty to report the matter to the appropriate bodies ie the police and social services in whatever locale this alleged perpetrator is residing.
 
There is also the issue as to how Mr Williams came by a letter of this sensitivity, so obviously addressed to his anxious parent. Is the poor woman unaware of just what is going in that mountain fastness? At the very least a copy of this missive should be forwarded to her. (I suspect some sort of single parent from the evidence at hand.) But after that Mr W has a LOT of explaining to do!
 
I hope I have made my extreme disquiet clear....this site can occasionally be excellent fun....but THERE HAS TO BE A LIMIT!!
 
NOW! Back to my Daily Mail.
Nov. 14, 2009 
 
Picture of John Stickland
John Stickland
Hi all.
Stop it! You guys.
Ive just had to have a rollie to try to make sense of it all.
I bet Anth will do he same when he reads all this!
Ta Ra.
Sticky.
Nov. 14, 2009 
 
Hello all,
Glad to see the  enthusiasm in your response to this offering on these hallowed pages of wisdom. Tanks to Mr. Sherman for his contribution, this one I`m sure was inspired by it .. this link reveals all  ..  http://investorshub.advfn.com/boards/read_msg.aspx?message_id=43098654
I have the recordings of most of his ( Shermans) material .. I can however, reveal that the story was sent to me this morning by a friend from Bristol.
 
As we speak, I am conversing with Anth on the phone .. so please excuse the spelling mistakes.   ... Regards. 
Nov. 14, 2009  (Edited Nov. 14, 2009)
 
Picture of Steve Coffin
Steve Coffin
If it's in the Daily Mail it must be true!!!
 
Steve
Nov. 14, 2009 
 
Picture of Stuart Stickler
Stuart Stickler
Sorry Bill but friends in Bristol sounds a bit like the same excuse as the "Man From Porlock", methinks you're going to have to bear the ultimate responsibility for this unfortunate minor's predicament. Thank God I was thrown out of the scouts after two weeks, long before summer camp became an option. I'll be watching the Daily Male (sic), with interest for the next few days, might have to peruse the Express also the connotations being so great. It's a considerable releif that the North Devon Journal consoles itself with little more than irate letters and petitions about the doings of Parking Officials in Torrington.
 
Yours Stu

 

PS, I did note the change of name from Keith to Ted can't imagine the ramifications from this, it seems to me as though there may be some sort of conspiracy involved, is there government involvement? does Mr.Speaker know?, or is he too involved in renovating his flat?

Must go there's a bottle of malt that requires further investigation.

PPS, Would seem that young Chris survived his encounter with crows.

Nov. 14, 2009  (Edited Nov. 14, 2009)
 
This post deleted by Francis Williams  Nov. 16, 2009
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